“Lie to Me”

Have you seen the TV show called “Lie to Me”? It features a deception expert who solves crimes by relying on his knowledge of body language.

I own five books about body language and thought I knew a lot about the subject. But “Lie to Me” has taught me much more.

Here is a sampling:

•  If you are in a conversation with someone who wants to get away from you, he or she will point a foot toward the door. The toes will point toward the exit as an expression of wishful thinking.

•  People tend to swallow hard when they are trying to stifle strong emotion. I recently asked a client how he felt about being passed up for a promotion. Before he began to answer my question, he swallowed, and then said that he felt fine about it. I didn’t believe him.

•  Most people think that when people are lying, they avoid eye contact. The fact is: when people are telling the truth, their eyes leave us as they seek the details of the story. When people are lying, there IS no story, so they tend to make strong eye contact because there is nowhere else to look. 

•  When people need comfort or protection, they bring their hands and arms together to protect their torso. This could be as subtle as lightly clasping hands together, or as obvious as crossing arms tightly around the upper body. Even a paperclip held between two hands can serve as a shield.

•  When people are ready to buy, they tend to change whatever they had been doing. If they had been leaning back, they will lean forward. If they had been wearing glasses, they will remove them. If they had been taking notes, they will lay their pens down.  

Body language is a silent communicator that “speaks” every second of every day – for as long as you have a body.